Too often, the moment we come up against resistance, we shut down.

We hit a scheduling conflict.
A financial challenge.
A timing issue.
A life circumstance that feels inconvenient.

And almost immediately, the mind moves to the familiar response:

“It’s not possible.”
“There’s no way.”
“I have too much going on.”
“Maybe another time.”

For so many people, resistance becomes the stop sign.

But what if it was never meant to stop you?
What if it was only meant to invite a better question?

How can I?

That one question changes everything.

It moves you from shutdown to solution.
From resistance to resourcefulness.
From victim to creator.

I had a moment like this recently.

We have just moved into our new home. There are boxes everywhere. The house still feels upside down. On top of that, my coaching calendar is full and life feels very full in this season.

Then an opportunity came my way to go on a retreat and impact a group of men.

My first instinct was no.

I have too much going on.
The timing is not ideal.
There is too much to handle here.
It just does not feel possible.

But instead of stopping there, I caught myself.

And I asked a different question.

How could I make this work?

That question immediately opened something up in me.

I renegotiated a few calls and moved them to different times. I shifted some things around. I got clear on what was truly necessary and crossed off what was not. And suddenly, what had felt impossible a few moments earlier became completely doable.

Now I get to go.

Same life.
Same responsibilities.
Same full calendar.
Different question.

That is the power of “How can I?”

So many people are not actually stuck because something is impossible. They are stuck because they stop at the first sign of friction. They assume resistance means no, when sometimes resistance is simply asking you to become more creative, more flexible, and more committed.

I am not saying every single thing should be forced. Some things are a clear no. Some things are not aligned. But many things we call impossible are simply things we have not yet decided to solve for.

There is a big difference.

One closes the door.
The other opens it.

So let me ask you:

Where in your life have you been saying no too quickly?
Where have you assumed something could not work simply because it would require you to think differently?
Where could you replace “It’s not possible” with “How can I?”

That one shift may be the very thing that changes what happens next.